Prank Calls
by Amina Bella
Summary: Maureen & Joanne get high and prank call the bohos. Rated 'T' for language.
1. Pranking Collins

**I'm baaack! Okay. I got this idea from a Youtube video. It's kind of retarded, but mind you, I haven't written ANYTHING in over a year. So, with that being said...here is 'Prank Calls'.**

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Chapter One: Pranking Collins

"Okay, girls, I'll see you later." Collins said, kissing and hugging Maureen and Joanne as he exited their apartment.

"Don't get to crazy with that shit." Collins playfully called out before closing the door, pointing to a little baggy full of weed on the coffee table.

Both girls giggled, and as soon as the door closed, Maureen hauled booty to the coffee table, plopping down in front of it. Joanne slowly walked over and sat down in front of her, nervousness gleaming in her eyes.

"Oh, calm down Pookie. It's not like we're doing acid or anything! You're just going to laugh...a lot. Over stupid shit. I won't let anything happen to you." Maureen finished the sentence in a baby voice, pinching Joanne's cheeks as she talked.

Joanne slapped her hand away. "Okay. Let's get this done with." Maureen smiled and went to work, perfectly rolling a joint. Joanne couldn't believe she let Maureen talk her into this. But since she had been so stressed with work lately, Maureen thought it'd be a good stress reliever.

"TADA!" Maureen sang as she finished her project. She stuck it particially in her mouth, lit it, and took a big drag off of it. Smiling as the smoke entered her lungs. After a few seconds, she let it all out, caughing.

"OHHH, THATS THE _GOOD_ SHEEIIT!" She giggled as she handed it to Joanne. She studied Maureen's face, which was flushed with already red tinted eyes.

"I can't believe I'm doing this." Joanne whispered. She took the substance from Maureen's hands, and slowly put it to her mouth. Shaking her head with disbelief, she inhaled the smoke and instantly caughed, causing them both to laugh.

_A few puffs, caughs, and snack cakes later..._

"Oh oh oh! I have an amazing idea!" Maureen squeaked, bouncing.

"And what would that be?" Joanne asked, hanging from the back of the couch, laughing at absolutely nothing at all.

"Let's prank call people!"

"Yeah boyyy!" Joanne yelled, getting a little too excited causing her to fall off the back of the couch, hitting the floor with a small thud, causing Maureen to fall backwards and laugh hysterically.

Joanne stood up quickly and walked over to where Maureen was. "Yes, that sounds like a splendid idea!" She said cooly, trying to play it all off.

"You are sooo baked, Jo." Maureen giggled.

"Fo sho." Joanne responded with wide eyes and a small grin. "Woooweee, sex is gunna be fun tonight!" She added before picking up the phone and handing it to her girlfriend.

Maureen's face scrunched up as she laughed at Joanne. "I can only imagine."

"Who should we call first?" Maureen asked, biting at the antena.

"COLLINS!" Joanne yelled.

Maureen dialed Collin's number and put it on speaker phone.

"Hello?"

"Col-lins!" Maureen yipped in a high pitched baby voice.

"Who is this?" Collins asked.

"John!" Maureen replied, causing Joanne to fall over laughing. "I think your sexy."

"Huh?"

"My name is John." Maureen answered, still using the high pitched baby voice. "I left my vacuum on your front porch."

"What?" Collins asked confused, not catching on as to what was going on.

"I left my vacuum--"

"What?"

"I want my vacuum back!"

"Huh?!" Collins asked annoyed.

"I. Want. My. Vacuum. Back." Maureen slowly said into the phone.

"I can't understand what you're saying." Collins said, pluging his other ear with his finger.

"Well, it's my accent I can't help it." Maureen said seriously. Finally, Collin's caught on.

"Why are you prank calling me? It's the stupidest shit ever."

"You're the stupidest shit ever." Joanne managed to say. Maureen fell over laughing, tears streaming down her face.

"Okay, you kids have fun." Collins said before hanging up the phone.

"NO, JOHN! DON'T DO IT! John? John?! JOHN?!"

click

"Oh, John went and done it now." Joanne said seriously.

"Now who?" Maureen asked, trying to avoid a giggle fit.

"MARK!" Both girls yelled, laughing excitedly.

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**I'll post the other chapters if you guys like this one. Honestly, the other ones are funnier than this. So, review. :)**


	2. Pranking Mark

Chapter two: Pranking Mark

Maureen dialed the number to the loft and put it on speaker phone.

"Hello?" Mark greeted into the phone.

"Seven days." Maureen creepily whispered into the reciever.

Mark scrunched up his nose and narrowed his eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"Seven...dayssssssss."

"Until..."

"Until you die fool!" Joanne piped in, annoyed that the film maker wasn't catching on; they should have known, Mark can't sit threw a horror movie to save his life.

Mark's face dropped a colour tone. "Why am I dying in seven days?"

Both girls tried to resist from laughing at how adorably gullible Mark was.

"Because you watched that tape, Mark. You shouldn't have watched that tape." Maureen replied, still using the creepy voice.

Mark swallowed hard. _How'd they know about that?!_

"Um...I don't...uh, know what you're talking about." He studard, causing the girls to look at eachother with curious faces.

Maureen held the phone out in front of her, so Mark couldn't hear.

"Do you think..." Maureen whispered.

"...Oh yeah. He totally watched that porno Roger had that Mimi wouldn't let him watch."

"Oh. This is gunna be goooood!" Maureen snorted, putting the phone back inbetween them.

"I think you do. You know God doesn't approve of things like that, Mark. You're doomed to hell. Without your camera!"

Mark clenched his chest and plopped down on the couch. "No camera?" He squeaked, looking over at it sympathetically.

"No camera." Maureen confirmed.

"No scarf either." Joanne added.

"No scarfy?!" Mark squeaked again.

"No scarfy." Joanne confirmed.

"But...but, I really didn't watch a tape." Mark lied, hopeing that would somehow redeem him from burning in the pits of hell...without his beloved camera and scarf.

Maureen had to give Joanne the phone because she started laughing and couldn't stop. She couldn't believe how gullible Mark was.

Joanne cleared her throat and lowered her voice.

"Lying only makes things worse, Mark. Now you only have five days."

"WHAT?!" Mark panicked. "Does that mean I'm dying next Monday?" He wandered.

Joanne and Maureen looked at eachother.

"Is he catching on?" Maureen managed to whisper.

Joanne shrugged. "I guess we're about to find out."

"Yes. No. Wait. Monday? That would be five business days. This is five days starting now."

"So, five days to this very hour, I'm going to die?" Mark asked.

Joanne was getting irritated.

"Forget hours, it's five days from NOW!"

"But there's a holiday coming up. Do you count holidays?"

Joanne was about fed up at this point. Meanwhile, Maureen was thrashing around on the floor.

"I'm giving you five friggin' business days. I can come over now and kill the shit out of you if you'd rather have that!"

Maureen snorted.

"So we're not counting the weekends, correct?"

Joanne sighed. "Bye, Mark."

"By Joanne. Oh, and tell Maureen that she needs to be more quiet when trying to prank call someone."

_click_

Joanne tossed the phone to Maureen, who was basically seizuring on the floor. After a few moments, she reclaimed her normality and sat up.

"He actually had US going for a while."

Joanne laughed. "How about Roger now?"

"Oh, that'll be interesting."

**Okay, so. I had something totally different written, and it was A LOT more funny. But then I broke my laptop and I lost it. So, I came up with this. I wish it were funnier, but I'm just drawing blanks here. Not writing for over a year really screws you up. And yes, I stole a few lines from SM3. Haha...anyway, review if you want. If I get more than 5 reviews I'll do the next one. If you have any idea's on how to prank Roger, lemme know! Thanks for dealing with my shitty writting! Haha.**


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